Sunday, September 14, 2003

Recommissioning Sunday

6.8 Km, 34:00.2, Overcast 1 °C, 5 km wind

Continued from yesterday

... Then I got to thinking about how I "control" the PBGs. My thoughts are in the drivers seat. It is my agenda that is on the table. They make comments about, and additions to my monologue, but it is me who is the script writer.

Am I so vain as to think that I am "writing" myself a better part in God's play?

Actually, no. In truth, I don't delude myself that way. Deep down I know who is in charge. I realize that I have influence on what happens around me, but that I have a very tenuous control. It would take very little for my 'house of cards' world that I have built up around me to come toppling down.

The fact that I have any influence at all in this crazy mixed up world is the true blessing. That is why it is so important that I use the gifts God has given me to enhance the world around me. I cannot change the overall map of the Plan, but I still have the free will to mark my own trail on it.

In fact , the Plan is the result of the sum total of all of Humanities reaction to what it is to be alive.

When stated that way, it is obvious that I have a say, but that I am not in control.

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