Thursday, October 17, 2002

Spiritual Advisor?

?? Km, ??:??.?, Cloudy 13 °C, 25 km wind

I met with our churches Minister today for lunch. I expected it to be 16 °C so I didn't wear a coat. I told him a little about the PBGs and he told me a little about his being a minister. I saw some parallels between him relationship with his brother and my relationship with my brother S. In the course of our conversation, I discovered that one of the strongest influences I had for creating the PBGs was a lack of direction. Up to this point in my life, I always had some goal and some hope of getting there. Now I have lost faith in all of my dreams and have no hope of attaining them. So, I require an external source of direction. Sounds like a perfect home for a roll-your-own deity to me.

Why invent one (two)? With my reluctance to make a fool of myself (be wrong?) it is much easier to believe in something I know isn't true than to risk saying I believe in something that cannot be proven and may in fact be total garbage.

My minister says there isn't much interest in the "Faith Inquiry"; just me so far. He says that perhaps we could form a small group of people; perhaps a book study or something.

I told him that what I was really looking for was some community. I also told him that I really didn't go for the "prayer" time or formal Christian tradition stuff. He admitted that most groups have that component, but that it usually was a small component of any gathering. I guess, from my limited experience, I agree with that.

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